Shrinkage: Not a Good Look
If you’re familiar with the world of Seinfeld, you already know that shrinkage doesn’t help your cause. In the episode that expanded its definition, a beautiful woman walks into the room, while the character George Costanza has his towel open with no clothes. She looks down, snickers, and leaves, while George yells after her, “I was in the pool!” As George and Jerry discuss the issue, they speak with Elaine and realize that women don’t all know about shrinkage, the phenomenon that causes certain body parts to shrink in cold water.
In the real world, shrinkage can affect far more than just the most private parts of life. Phrases like “shrink back” and “shrink in fear” describe what can happen when faced with major obstacles and fright. When someone around the corner sneaks up on you and says, “boo,” you might literally make yourself smaller and contract into a protective position. Facing a longterm or more subtle anxiety, you might notice your posture change over time, from one of openness to the world to one more withdrawn, tense, or receded.
When it comes to expansion versus shrinkage, abundance versus scarcity, our mindset really does transform everything from our posture, to our relationships, our performance, our decisions, our bottom line, and our overall life satisfaction. In studies on poverty and cognitive function, Princeton psychologist Eldar Shafir discovered that farmers’ IQ levels dropped by ten points from their richest wealth of resources at harvest time to when they experienced the most scarcity. Having to deal with lack or perceived lack actually occupies so much bandwidth that our minds don’t think straight.
Facing our present and future times of great change in our world, we might perceive life as less full. Not enough time, not enough money, not enough freedom, not enough real connection — whatever your scarcity menu suggests. In his book, Positive Intelligence, Shirzad Chamine identifies the lie we so often hear from a “judge of circumstances” that stems from the survival mechanism in our brain: “You will be happy when.” Problematically, the “when” always moves, and we never reach the goal line.
As a friend challenged me recently to cross a relatively high and wide but rusty bridge over murky water, I put one foot in front of the other and remained upright, but I walked with a fair amount of shrinkage, fear, and trepidation. I definitely thought, “I will be happier when I’m off this bridge.” You might think I shouldn’t have tried it at all, or that my extreme apprehension protected me. No. Allowing our fear to walk with us only sabotages our performance. Cautious confidence would have best prepared me for a successful journey across the bridge. Still, although I didn’t do any little turns on the catwalk, something shifted in me as I made it to the other side.
Simply taking the dare itself forced me to face my shrinkage, my judge, and my fears. Although I confronted them with my timid and mousy walk, that first step allowed this mouse to speak up and recognize the scarcity in which I’d lived for many months. A major perspective shift has opened up in me since that moment, allowing me to let go of my judge of circumstances more often, see the possibilities right in front of me, and feel the expansion I hadn’t regularly felt since the opera industry shut down. Thankfully, I don’t need to wait to adjust to the colder waters of life to let go of my shrinkage mentality. Instead, I’ll keep crossing the bridge into the mindset of expansion and abundance, daring myself daily to embrace what’s possible.
Abigail Wright is a transformational coach, singer, and author. You can find her work at abigailwright.com. Learn more about her coaching practice and book a sample session at timeforchange.coach.
References
Chamine, Shirzad. Positive Intelligence. Greenleaf Book Group Press, 2012.
“The Hamptons.” Seinfeld, created by Jerry Seinfeld and Larry David, performance by Jason Alexander, season 5, episode 20, NBC, 12 May 1994.
Novotny, Amy. “The Psychology of Scarcity.” American Psychological Association, https://www.apa.org/monitor/2014/02/scarcity.
